Simple Coaching Skills
for Parents and Teachers

“Important” Breakthrough

“Important” Breakthrough

“Important” Breakthrough

You say what’s important to you.

Sounds logical, but through most of my life, I looked to my circumstances or other people for permission to decide if something was important to me — including myself!

I didn’t see it this way at the time, but I actually gave others the power to say what was important for me. That’s what you do when you can’t say what you like or want without fear of repercussions.

If you’ve read my other blog entries or seen my personal growth videos, you’ve seen some of my breakthroughs evolve. Many (not yet published) are in the area of saying what I like and want, because for me, the ability to recognize and say what I like and want more freely had to be in place before I could even explore what it would be like to be the one to say what’s important in my life. After all, if other people don’t dictate what’s important, then what do you base it on? What you like and want, of course.

If you are hesitant about saying what you like and want, start there. SAYing WHAT YOU SEE for you might sound like, “You think you can’t say what you like/want.” If you agree with yourself, you can continue the internal dialog, but keep noticing where this is true and where it is not. The pronoun “you” will help you stay in the observer role.

Meanwhile, there’s another side to it that you can consider. By looking to others to decide what’s important for you, you are actually practicing deciding what’s important for yourself – or in this case, who is important – you just don’t know it. How?

You decide whose permission counts and whose doesn’t.

That guy on the street? Probably not. Your father? Probably so. During the dating years it could be nice guys or nice girls that don’t count! The list goes on.

If this applies to you, let me know what you see. It’s often funny little twists in logic like this that can lead to great big “important” breakthroughs.

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